I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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