After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
