She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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