I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
We need to get me chipped asap
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
