Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
