I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
