please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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