You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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