I think I am morally bankrupt
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
