Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
