so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Did I show you my penis last night?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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