my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
My bed smells like the plague
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
