I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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