When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
