Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
