Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
