What a fucking waste of an outfit
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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