Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
