Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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