i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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