Soap is not a condiment
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize