At least make sure they are 18
Why
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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