I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
