I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
