did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
