It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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