I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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