he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
