Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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