i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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