I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Are we still banned from the library?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
So here I am, sexting at work.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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