he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
