i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
