She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
