Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
