I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
