Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
