You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
