butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
should my penis look like a turkey
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
