Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
