I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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