i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
