Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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