My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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