waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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