you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
