Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
It's shark week go big or go home
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Randomize
