ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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