Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I need to sanitize my soul.
So vagazzling was a success
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
