I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize